Each of us has a body. Sometimes we’re aware of it, and other times not so much. Mindfulness, moment-to-moment awareness of what is in a gentle nonjudgmental way, invites us to be present and aware of the body.
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Each of us has a body. Sometimes we’re aware of it, and other times not so much. Mindfulness, moment-to-moment awareness of what is in a gentle nonjudgmental way, invites us to be present and aware of the body.
When we’re nonjudgmental, we can observe our thoughts and feelings to gain insights. When we apply these insights to how we feel about the body, we can see patterns of behavior and learn from them. Let’s take a minute to apply mindfulness to the body we have and explore our relationship to it.
When you think about having a body, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Where do your thoughts go? Do you think about your body as a whole? Do you think about specific aspects of your body? Do you think about things that your body does? Do you think about things that you can’t do? Do you think about your body’s needs? Do you think about self-care? There are so many aspects to consider. Whether front and center or hidden by denial, the body matters and cannot be ignored. Let’s look at it mindfully!
Liking the Body
Along with the content of what comes to mind, there may be feelings. How do you feel about your body? Take a moment to answer honestly. Are there some things you like about your body? Are there some things you don’t like? There are no right or wrong answers. Mindfulness invites us to be curious about what we’re thinking and feeling.
Liking our own bodies is determined by so many things: our cultural context, our personal history, the messages we get from the media, from our families, from our friends. It can change based on the way our clothes fit, our beliefs about weight, a remark or casual comment, a role model from youth—the possibilities are endless.
Liking the body is also linked to judging the body. (Have I succeeded in achieving the look, weight, musculature I desire?) Liking the body is often comparative, if not competitive. Questions such as, “Does she look more attractive than me?” or “Who’s wearing that item of clothing better?” come to mind.
It can also be conditional, based on outcome. “I’ll be happy when I’m a size 6,” or “I’ll feel better about myself when I can fit into my old jeans.” Unfortunately, the liking can evaporate in a moment if we step on a scale and see a number that upsets us.
If there are things you don’t like about your body, you’re not alone. In a 2020 survey, 55% of American women and 42% of men reported some dissatisfaction with at least one aspect of their appearance.
While we may not like everything about our looks, we can move toward appreciating our body beyond that sole criterion. Our cultural obsession with appearance has been described as “beauty sickness,” where focusing on looks takes over other aspects of our lives, such as attention to health, well-being or relating to people we love.
Related: Top 7 Mindfulness Techniques
Loving and Appreciating the Body
Becoming aware of specific aspects of the body that we love can be a counterpoint to body negativity. While I may not like the size of my nose, I love my hair. While I wish I could lose some weight, I love the strength of my body. Often there can be an inner critic that has become so familiar that we don’t even hear its refrain of negativity.
Mindfulness allows us to hear self-talk, whether it’s neutral, negative or positive, as it occurs throughout our day. Becoming aware of internal commentary on appearance offers an opportunity to quiet the inner critic. Take some time to think about physical features that you do value, and call to mind this positive list to begin counterbalancing negativity when your inner critic starts talking.
Expressing gratitude about your body can be a powerful way to explore another way of relating to your physical self. Focusing on what your body does instead of only how it looks can bring you into a new alignment. Being aware of and appreciating the many physical functions of your body can provide a lift in how you relate to your body. Breathing, walking, seeing, singing, healing bruises, mending broken bones, regenerating body cells, regulating body temperature—there are so many things going on, so remarkably well, and all underneath the level of awareness.
Appreciating the body mindfully is an exercise in gratitude that can support awareness of how much the body does each day to contribute to well-being. Can you think of 10 functions in which your body serves you well? Think about how it feels to move beyond appearance into respecting and appreciating the body’s functionality.
Caring for the Body
Nurturing the body and supporting the physical self with healthy foods, quality sleep and exercise are all important practices for overall well-being. The way we approach and create these habits can make a difference in how well we’re able to sustain them.
Cultivating these practices as opportunities for wellness through self-care of a body for which we are grateful becomes an ongoing invitation to nurture ourselves. With this perspective, actions are based on appreciation and love for the body we have. If the perspective is punitive, it can be more difficult to stay motivated for sustainable self-care.
Do you feel a difference when you think about taking actions to help your body be healthy and strong because it makes you feel good, rather than using guilt as motivation to try to change your appearance?
Caring for the body also involves nurturing the mind by protecting yourself from negative influences that create dissatisfaction with your body. “Protective filtering,” for instance, is about being aware of social media, the insidious way it invites comparisons and the way that affects you. Choosing to disengage from influencers and celebrities whose posts create discomfort due to their excessive focus on appearance is, in fact, an act of self-care.
Remember that time is precious. Asking yourself how you want to spend the days, hours and minutes of your life can support your relationship with your body.
If disliking your body is bringing discomfort into your life, mindfulness offers an invitation to bring compassion into the moments when this occurs. Once we’ve observed body thoughts without judgment, we can choose to let them go. If “body love” feels like pressure and too distant to explore now, consider the possibility of “body neutrality,” which is the space between positive and negative polarities.
Moment-to-moment awareness of the remarkable functionality of the body invites body respect and body appreciation. Body acceptance is the opportunity for each of us to be peacefully present with and within our own unique bodies, doing our best to nurture ourselves one moment at a time.
Nina Smiley, Ph.D., director of mindfulness programming at Mohonk Mountain House in New Paltz, New York, holds a doctoral degree in psychology from Princeton University. She is the coauthor of The Three Minute Meditator and Mindfulness in Nature, as well as the CD “Mini-Meditations That Will Enhance Your Life.”
